Well said! I've been pondering some ancient views on friendship, and for instance the Stoics say that it's good to have a lot of friends. I dislike the modern cant often told to kids - 'Choose your friends carefully!' - because nobody, least of all kids, is in a position to be choosy at all: they, and we, need friends, and the kid who's choosy is likely to finish up with none.
Love the argument you've laid out here! I remember once in my first job after college, I invited an acquaintance to drinks after work -- except, I hadn't meant to invite her! I'd meant to invite a friend with almost the exact same name. I'd confused the two and messaged the wrong one: "you, me, catch up drinks on Tuesday!" The acquaintance was completely taken aback by my invitation but also very happy with how bold I was at extending friendship. We became instantly closer than we would have otherwise. Barring my mistake, I probably would have referred to her as a "friend of a friend" at parties.
We do have the word "bestie" as a one-word version of "close friend." That would fit the "time of need" kind of friend. I do consider people I've never met except on FB real friends--not all of them, but enough. I'd never expect them to come from Florida to Seattle to help me move furniture--but we understand each other, sympathize truly with their troubles, and rejoice in their positives.
You Can't Overuse the Word ‘Friend’
Well said! I've been pondering some ancient views on friendship, and for instance the Stoics say that it's good to have a lot of friends. I dislike the modern cant often told to kids - 'Choose your friends carefully!' - because nobody, least of all kids, is in a position to be choosy at all: they, and we, need friends, and the kid who's choosy is likely to finish up with none.
Great points, friend! 🙃😁
Agreed, calling someone a friend is one of those self-fulfilling statements. I do way too little of this, and should be more generous about it.
Love the argument you've laid out here! I remember once in my first job after college, I invited an acquaintance to drinks after work -- except, I hadn't meant to invite her! I'd meant to invite a friend with almost the exact same name. I'd confused the two and messaged the wrong one: "you, me, catch up drinks on Tuesday!" The acquaintance was completely taken aback by my invitation but also very happy with how bold I was at extending friendship. We became instantly closer than we would have otherwise. Barring my mistake, I probably would have referred to her as a "friend of a friend" at parties.
We do have the word "bestie" as a one-word version of "close friend." That would fit the "time of need" kind of friend. I do consider people I've never met except on FB real friends--not all of them, but enough. I'd never expect them to come from Florida to Seattle to help me move furniture--but we understand each other, sympathize truly with their troubles, and rejoice in their positives.